Return of the Zack

This post contains spoilers.....you have been warned.

Following on from my partner in crimes review of Batman vs Superman: Dawn of Justice (posted yesterday) I figured it was time to share my thoughts and feelings on chapter 2 of Warner Brothers planned DCEU (thats extended universe to you and me).

Chapter 1 of course was 2013's Man of Steel which was directed by Zack Snyder who was subsequently given the reigns to control the whole universe, making him DC's very own Kevin Feige. Speaking of Man of Steel that was most certainly a film that you either loved or loathed and I have to confess that I was firmly encamped in the latter of those two categories. As a huge fan of Christopher Reeve there will only ever be one true Superman and no matter what any director or actor delivers it is highly unlikely that my opinion is ever going to change. Now that isn't to say that I will never enjoy somebody else portraying theLast Son of Krypton as not unlike my World of Stu colleague Dave I will admit to having a soft spot for Superman Returns and I really enjoyed Brandon Rouths performance as both Clark Kent and Kal El.

So why didn't I like Man of Steel? Some may say that it is purely down to a personal disliking for Snyder but that is simply not the case. Do I think he is a director who prefers style over substance? Absolutely, and I would even go so far as to proclaim that I don't think hes very good at structuring a good story but even so I enjoyed his Dawn of the Dead remake (as much as I like any reboot that is) and Watchmen is a thoroughly fantastic film though it is not without its faults. When it comes to Man of Steel however Snyder removed all the heart from the character and delivered nothing more than a loud, flashy film that cared more for its set pieces than giving any thought to plot or character development, and as for the overblown mess that is the final act of the film, the less I say about that the better.

So it was with great trepidation that I greeted the news that he would be bringing Frank Millers The Dark Knight Returns to the big screen as the source material is much loved and Snyder would be one of my last choices to do the comic book justice (no pun intended). Now of course Dawn of Justice is not and was never intended to be an adaptation of Millers work, rather it was always just a film that would take the central idea behind the end of the story (that being a fight between the two DC icons) and twist it in such a way that it fit with all the other threads that the director was hoping to weave. You see this was never 'just' a film about Bats scrapping with Supes because Snyder has been tasked with bringing forth the Justice League in order that Warner Brothers and DC can compete with the Marvel juggernaut that has been rolling for the last 10 years. The problem with this of course is that before we got to Marvels first team up in the form of Avengers Assemble we had already been introduced to an assortment of characters including Iron Man, Thor, Black Widow, War Machine, SHIELD, Loki, the rest of Asgard, Hulk, Abomination and so on. Whilst DC on the other hand have only established Superman, Batman, Alfred, Wonder Woman, Lex Luthor, Doomsday and a few other Justice Leaguers in the form of Flash, Cyborg and Aquaman, though these three characters are so fleeting in Dawn of Justice that its far from the same thing as Marvel had achieved.

I will also admit that I took umbridge with the casting of Ben Affleck as the Caped Crusader as I really did not see how this could possibly work, especially coming off the back of Christian Bale smashing it out of the park in his portrayal of Batman in Christopher Nolans trilogy. Adding this casting choice to Henry Cavill returning to further murder the Superman character and I was looking forward to this film about as much as the godawful Ghostbusters remake that is heading our way later this year.

It appeared that my fears were to be realised when the final trailer was released, a trailer that appeared to spoil the plot of the entire film although Snyder was adamant that there was plenty that he hadn't shown and that we as fans would be pleasantly surprised.

All of which brings to March 25th 2016, the date that Batman vs Superman: Dawn of Justice finally hit our cinema screens giving us the opportunity to see for ourselves just what Snyder could deliver.

So to the plot -

The film opens with a brief retelling of the origin of Batman. If you have seen the Batman films that have come before then you'll be all to familiar with the story. Bruces parents are murdered and he falls down an abandoned shaft at the bottom of which he has a run in with some bats that inspire him to one day don the cowl and become Batman.Now this time around we are treated to young Bruce being lifted out of the shaft by the bat swarm which was the first (but certainly not the last) moment that had me shaking my head. For the record I should point out that this is later clarified as being a dream but for this particular batfan it was just plain dumb.

We are then taken back to the destruction of Metropolis at the hands of Superman and Zod during their battle at the end of Man of Steel. This time around however we get to see the whole thing from the perspective of Bruce Wayne who is on the ground trying to be all heroic and save people as a man in the shadow of a god. This sequence is frankly brilliant and quickly made up for the stupid bat lift that preceded it, in fact it gave me hope that the film was actually going to be awesome and not suck like I had feared it was going to.

From here however things most definately take a turn for the worse as we are treated to an hour of almost nothing happening. Now of course I am being facetious but when a film comes in at over 2.5 hours long and an hour of that is spent doing next to nothing you do have to wonder why they didn't just shave 30 minutes or so off the running time and tighten the whole thing up. So what does happen in this section of the movie? Well we delve into Bruce Waynes distrust of Superman as well as Clark Kents bad vibes about the vigilante Batman. We are also introduced to Lex Luthor, actually it is Alexander Luthor or Lex Jr but regardless of that aside the character is nothing short of annoying (and not in an intentional way) and is hammed up by Jesse Eisenberg who is seemingly attempting to channel the spirit of every version of the Joker ever committed to screen (and yes I'm including Caesar Romero from the 60's Batman tv show). Lex has of course stumbled across a source of Kryptonite and manipulates his way into getting access to the crashed Kryptonian spaceship from Man of Steel. He doesn't get to use the Kryptonite however as Batman steals it from him, not that we get to see this take place as we catch up with Lex at the scene of the crime after the fact which comes across as really odd though I'm going to assume that the actually heist by the Dark Knight will make its way into the over 3 hour long directors cut which will be winging its way onto blu-ray in a few months time.

We also meet Wonder Woman in this part of the film although this is only briefly and seems to be only to establish a relationship with Bruce Wayne who as we all know has an eye for the ladies. Now remember that crashed ship that Lex has access to? Not only that but he also has access to Zods dead body which he discovers can be resurrected to create a monster of some kind if he mixes it with his own human blood (yeah I know that doesn't make a whole lot of sense but this is a comic book movie you know). Meanwhile Superman is called to answer for crimes that he didn't actually commit (people working for Lex are actually responsible) but the senate hearing is blown up (also at the hands of Lex) thus killing everyone there except for Supes who of course is held responsible by those who didn't trust him in the first place.

Oh I should also mention that Bruce Wayne has his very own dream sequence during this part of the film (boy does he like to dream). A dream in which he sees the destruction of all he holds dear, a destruction that is clearly the handiwork of Darkseid (the DC version of Thanos for those of you who have never heard of him but have watched all the Marvel movies to date). He then battles some Superman loving nazis as well as parademons (minions of Darkseid) before getting knocked out, chained up and then waking from his slumber just as Supes goes to kill him. He then has another dream within his dream where he is visited by Flash who pops back from the future to warn Brucie boy that he is right to distrust Superman and that Lois Lane is the key (Snyder has also clearly been reading Injustice Gods Among Us, I recommend reading this is you haven't already as it's very good and will give you a hint of where Snyder is likely to be heading in the first part of the Justice League movie he is set to direct).

All of this leads to our third act which is the long promised battle between the two titans as 90 minutes into the film Lex finally manages to manipulate the two of them into scrapping. Quite why he has done this is unclear but hey he's crazy old Lex (Jr) so he doesn't have to justify his actions does he. So how does he force them to fight? Well he taps into Batmans fears that Superman is going to kill us all whilst kidnapping Supermans mum to force him to do his bidding. Herein lies another issue I have with this film. Everytime Lois Lane is put in jeopardy Superman shows up in double quick time to save her candy ass. His mum gets kidnapped once however and he is nowhere to be found, I guess hes not that much of a mummys boy after all.

So Supes doesn't want to fight Bats but Bats is't listening to any of his excuses, preferring instead to level the playing field with a hefty dose of Kryptonite in order to smash his opponents face in. This is of course the part of the film that we have all been salivating over since the films announcement but unfortunately it's over almnost as soon as it begins, in fact the whole affair draws to a close in 6 minutes, yep that's right 6 MINUTES, 360 seconds of the aforementioned 2.5 hour running time is devoted to the fight that appears in the title of the film and if that wasn't bad enough the way in which the fight ends could conceivably be the worst moment in comic book movie history. Why do I make this claim? Well you see Batman has SUperman at his mercy and is about to finish him off with his Kryptonite spear. Superman accepting his fate asks Batman to save his Martha (the name of his kidnapped mother) and Batman stops in his tracks looking dazed and confused by this strange turn of events. You see Bruces long lost mum also had the first name Martha so this connection between the two is enough to stop throwing punches and decide to put their differences aside (I kid you not this is actually what happens).

So Batman goes off to save Martha whilst Superman heads off to front up to Lex. Batman has another great scene as he batters criminals senseless whilst Superman is confronted by Doomsday (the monster I mentioned earlier) who proceeds to kick his ass. Whilst this is occurring Wonder Woman has a gander at some computer files that Bruce has stolen from Lex and gets a brief glimpse of Flash, Aquaman and Cyborg in what can only be described as the most blatant crowbarring of information needed for the future of a franchise that we have ever had the misfortune of seeing. She then decides to join the fray as the Trinity (surprisingly Snyder doesn't use this term) do their best to take out Lexs creation. Before the final battle however the government nukes Doomsday and Supes apparently killing the Man of Steel but only making Doomsday bigger and stronger than he was before. Superman is revived by the suns rays (we have seen this happen countless times before) and rejoins his comrades in the fight, a fight that they are most definately losing. That is until Superman stabs Doomsday with Batmans Kryptonite spear finally felling the beast, not before Doomsday stabs Superman in the chest killing him at the same time (Snyder really loves him some comic books as he taps into the Death of Superman to complete his trifecta of literary influences).

The film ends with Lex in prison where he babbles about a bell ringing and 'him' coming (another reference to Darkseid, though quite how he knows this is anybodies guess, unless he learnt something whilst being on the Kryptonian ship). Bruce and Diana (Wonder Woman) attend Clark Kents funeral in Smallville (rather than Supermans funeral in Metropolis) where they discuss getting the band together (it's a Justice League reference people), and Lois throws soil onto the coffin which moves to indicate that Superman is ALIVE (yep he was dead for all of about 5 minutes ffs).

And that is that (no post credit scene for DC), 150+ minutes of what could have been the greatest superhero showdown in cinematic history but what turned out to be nothing more than just another Snyder movie full of the same old schtick that he has delivered before. It was a film that I went into thinking I would hate it, predicting that Batfleck would fail and believing that I would score it no higher than 2 or 3 out of 10. Having watched it however I will eat humble pie and admit that somehow Affleck made it work and is the best thing about this film although as I have said elsewhere (on Episode 47 of the World of Stu show) being the best thing in an average movie is not exactly something to write home about. I have seen it said online that Batfleck is the greatest portrayal of the character of all time which is frankly about as incorrect as an opinion can be (though we are all entitled to our own opinions of course). For my money he would come in behind Adam West, Michael Keaton and my personal favourite Kevin Conroy but then I can understand why some people love his performance.

As I have said the film opens stupidly but turns it around with the immense destruction of Metropolis scene. It then delves into mediocrity for about an hour as it just gets boring (an emotion both my kids expressed at this time) before getting to the main event which is good though feels rushed. Not that I necessarily have an issue with the length of the fight as in the original comic book it doesn't go on very long and is the climax of a story that had built in the previous issues, however the way in which this fight finishes is one of the dumbest things I have ever seen and has no place in any movie let alone one of this importance to DC and Warner Brothers future plans.

Other things just feel rushed too like the introduction of the other 3 Justice Leaguers and Supermans death serves no real purpose other than to telegraph what is going to happen in the Justice League movie (in my opinion Superman returns either as evil Supes straight away or goes that way after something happens to Lois (again see Injustice Gods Among Us) and sides with big bad Darkseid in his fight against the forces of good (team Batman).

One other issue I have with this film is the trailer that I mentioned near the beginning of this review. As I said Snyder claimed that the trailer hadn't ruined the film and that there would be plenty that we didn't know about, well this is frankly rubbish as outside of the death of Superman (which some fans predicted as soon as Doomsday was announced) there was nothing in this film that was shown or hinted at in that trailer and as such you could argue that there was very little reason to actually watch this film.

With all that said fans have been flocking to see Batman vs Superman and over its opening weekend it took over $240,000,000 at the box-office although it has taken a critical thrashing as those who are paid to critique such things have almost across the board slated it (it's Rotten Tomatoes score has fallen to 28%). It will of course break the billion dollar barrier and all involved will claim victory but I for one am not looking forward to any DC movies with Snyder at the helm.

In closing I will give this film 6 out of 10 which is more than I was expecting to give it but less than what you would expect a film of this magnitude to be deserving of. I would recommend seeing this film for yourself but for me the best superhero movie of 2016 thus far has to be Deadpool which unlike Dawn of Justice will not have the legacy of ridiculousness like MARTHA!!!!